For my gender cartoon, I drew the time that I first came out?? with my proper pronouns. As everyone in the class probably knows by now, I worked at a summer camp this summer, called Camp Tannadoonah. I attended Camp T for nine years as a camper, beginning when I was seven years old. I worked in the kitchen two summers ago when I was 16, and I spent this past summer working as the camp photographer. I have had struggles with my own gender dysphoria for a long time, so I have had a relative idea for a while that my pronouns are not limited to just she/her. In the months leading up to camp, I was debating whether I use they/them pronouns or she/her pronouns. I was torn between the two because 1) I had always used she/her pronouns and didn't hate being called them 2) I liked the idea of they/them pronouns but I had never used they/them pronouns before, so how would I know if they were right for me? I ultimately decided that I felt the most comfortable with using she/they pronouns when referring to myself. However, I wasn't ready for everyone, or anyone, to know that. So, when I came to camp for two weeks of staff training, I introduced myself to the the staff using she/her pronouns.
Camp T has always been a very accepting place. This summer was the first one, though, where counselors would include their pronouns when introducing themselves to the rest of the camp on the first night of the week, each week. For the first 4 staff introductions, I ran through the same routine: name, job, what cabin I lived in, fun icebreaker question, and pronouns, which were she/her every time. Every time, though, as I waited for other staff members to go, I would ask myself if now was the time to say my real pronouns. Outing myself to a group of random kids wasn't that big of a deal to me. If you say you like to be called they, chances are most of them will call you that. I was more worried about outing myself to my coworkers. Among them, my brother and some of my childhood best friends. I was worried that I wasn't going to be accepted by them, although they always respected and accepted any person's pronouns that they came across.
Ultimately, I decided that it didn't matter to me at the end of the day what someone else's opinion of me was. If my friends and brother had a problem with a word, then why would I want them to be a part of my life? Well, much to my surprise, no one said anything to me about my pronouns. Me wanting to use she/they pronouns didn't change how my friends and brother viewed me. I was the same person that I've always been, just going by a few extra words. I continued announcing my pronouns as she/they for the next three weeks, each time, my voice becoming more strong and assured. I still hesitate when I tell people my pronouns. It's still a very scary thing to me. What gets me through it though, is remembering how accepted I was when I was at camp. Regardless of what people in Champaign or other parts of the world think of me, I know that at Camp T, I will always have a group of people that I can trust and feel completely comfortable with.
